I am not here to verify.
I am not here to answer.
I feel now like I am lying in the ruins of a place long destroyed. Dressed sparingly, but not cold, I feel like a child confused…but not scared. I think its all in my eyes…spanning slowly, taking it all in. I tell myself this will all make sense tomorrow. And I don’t panic.
Opposites require small distinctions. Never and always are really just a breath away. I am both here and there, all at once. And it is just a breath away. One choice, and everything alters on a dime.
Water and fire are not alike, but they both destroy. Small distinctions, and where you see it from is always the question. I am still the same as I was yesterday, except that I am not.
They say most snakes shed their skins once a year. Losing the hard, semi-transparent skin requires a process. A barrier is formed between the new skin and the old, requiring this resilient creature to rub itself against rocks until the old layer is loosened from the barrier. Once ready…the snake literally walks out of its skin.
I am in the barrier. Slowly massaging away this old, tired, semi-transparent skin. Moments of suffocation give way to moments of breath. I am both new and old at the same time. And i continue to massage, until the rest falls away.
Early on, I thought it would happen slowly and not at all at once. Now I see I will massage, bend, twist, feel…until I get up and walk right out.
For now, I will consciously occupy this place, for it is not fate that brings me here, but will. My will, my choice. I’ll hold it in the palms of my hands and it will hold me, as though I am in and of this world all at once.